I am my own Grandpa . . .

By Dwight Latham & Moe Jaffe


Many, many years ago when I was twenty-three,

I got married to a widow who was pretty as could be.

This widow had a grownup daughter

Who had hair of red

My father fell in love with her,

And soon they too were wed.


This made my Dad my son-in-law

And changed my very life.

For now my daughter was my mother,

'Cause she was my father's wife


To further complicate the matter,

Although it brought me joy,

I soon became the father

Of a bouncing baby boy.


My little baby then became

A brother-in-law to Dad.

And so became my uncle,

Though it made me very sad.


For if he was my uncle,

Then that also made him brother

To the widow's grownup daughter,

Who, of course, was my stepmother.


Father's wife then had a son,

Who kept them on the run.

And he became my grandson,

For he was my daughter's son.


My wife is now my mother's mother,

And it makes me blue.

Because, although she is my wife,

She's my grandmother, too.


Now if my wife is my grandmother,

Then I am her grandchild.

And every time I think of it,

It nearly drives me wild.


'Cause now I have become

The strangest case you ever saw.

As the husband of my grandmother,

I am my own grandpa!


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